By Ian Lawton, April 4, 2010 | transcript

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Transcript for April 4, 2010 by Ian Lawton
Jesus was at the Last Supper with his disciples. He looked around the table. In one direction he saw Judas Iscariot, and recognized betrayal in his eyes. He then looked the other way and saw Peter sitting near the door, as if he was ready to escape. Then he noticed Thomas across from him, looking doubtful and unsure. Jesus looked up and down the table, then called the waiter over. He whispered in the waiter’s ear, “We’re going to need separate checks please.” …

By Ian Lawton, February 14, 2010 | text

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Transcript for February 14, 2010 by Ian Lawton | video
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face and the egg is frowning and looking defeated. The egg mutters, to no-one in particular, “Well, I guess we answered THAT question!”
I guess they did. I want to begin by asking the question, “What comes first?” I mean, before I talk about sex, what comes first?
What framework or context can I put sex and intimacy into so that …

By Ian Lawton, January 10, 2010 | text

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Transcript for January 10, 2010 by Ian Lawton | video
I’m just back from 2 wonderful weeks in Sydney with family. The 32 hour commute is so fresh that my cankles haven’t yet subsided from their puffy, Mrs. Doubtfire-esque glory. Under the circumstances, it seemed best to tackle a straightforward topic. So I chose as my theme “the immortality of the soul”. If that doesn’t conquer jet lag, I don’t know what would.

By the way, my favorite quote about jetlag comes from Barbara Kingsolver in Animal Dreams. She says, “When you …

Transcript for December 27, 2009 By Bob Kleinheksel
We shall continue to foot it – into the depths of winter. Goaded on by lengthening days, we journey side by side; we understand our shared stories and traditions step by step as individuals in community: Connected, linked, in communion, forgetful of our mistakes, beautiful in our uniqueness. Welcome, be at peace – and know the strength in your voice and presence.

For each here brings warm energy, uncommon giftedness, passions to add. And now, in the safety of …

Transcript for December 24, 2009 By Bob Kleinheksel
Come, O come Emmanuel, Great Spirit of life, beauty and truth – dwelling in, between, around and beyond all we know. We gather again in this place, celebrating the birth of love and our humanity that comes through billions of years of emergence, beauty, amazing grace and love. We are harried, despondent, fearful, angry and expectant, and we are quiet now that our hearts and minds center on the joy of this season and recognize the rising star of new birth. …

Transcript for December 20, 2009 By Ian Lawton
A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. The doctor says, “Okay, Mrs. Jones, what’s the problem?” The mother says, “It’s my daughter. She keeps getting these cravings, she’s putting on weight and is sick most mornings.”
The doctor examines the girl, then turns to the mother and says, “Well, I don’t know how to tell you this but your daughter is pregnant. About 4 months would be my guess.”

The mother says, “Pregnant?! She can’t be, she has never ever been left alone …

Transcript for November 15, 2009 By Ian Lawton
An Illinois man left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and planned to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife an e-mail.
Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory.
Unfortunately, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly woman whose …