Transcript for July 12, 2009 by Ian Lawton

Traditional Russian nested dolls stack doll inside doll inside doll. Now you can get Democratic nested dolls. Obama on the outside, then Clinton inside him, then Carter, Johnson and Kennedy in the centre.

I saw a nice nested doll comic. It had a rotund Russian doll lying on a therapist’s couch, saying to her counselor, “I get the feeling there are lots of little “mes” inside me just trying to bust out. Am I going crazy doc?”

The nested doll is a profound metaphor for the spiritual journey of growth and connections. The universe itself is a nested whole, and each individual is a nested whole. When you uncover the outer layers of the self, you get closer and closer to your essence as a seed of Divine Wonder. The deeper into the nested selves you delve, the less striving and pretending there is. When you drop the need to measure up to society’s standards, a new layer is revealed. When you drop your assumptions about what you can and can’t do because of the past or your genetics or whatever excuse you come up with, a new layer is revealed. When you drop the attachment to your ideas of how the future will play out, a new layer is revealed.

It is peaceful and calm in there with nothing to prove and nothing to fear. You could say that the inner doll or self is God, or Ultimate Reality, or Divine Abundance or pure awareness, or I am. It is stillness beyond any need to protect or defend anything. It just is, and is completely at one with all that arises. You know what I’m talking about, because you have been there before, even if only for brief glimpses.

Wouldn’t it be blissful just to stay there, dwell in that peace? So why don’t you? Why live most of your life in the outer layers of the nested self, in the realm of fear, blame and excuses? When the inner layer is available at any and all times, why choose excuses over bliss. With every judgment, you add a layer. With every excuse, you add a layer of baggage that moves you another step away from your essential nature.

You think to yourself, “I can’t change. I’m not strong enough. I’m too old, too young, too late, too early, too extroverted, too introverted. I tried before and failed. I never tried and can’t begin now.” Do excuses add anything of value to your life? Do they serve you? Do they fill you with joy and optimism? Every excuse adds a layer of false thinking to your life that then has to be reprogrammed to bring you back to your divine essence. The crazy thing is that you want to live in divine essence. You know deep down in places you can barely remember that you are destined to live in divine essence. But still you add the layers of blame.

Enough is enough. Let this be the day where you say with conviction, “excuses begone!” Don’t even struggle with the idea. Let the excuses go because you know they aren’t serving you. You haven’t forgotten the truth of who you are, you have just become good at deceiving yourself. You almost convinced yourself that you have no choice. But you can choose. Choose, don’t excuse. Then enjoy the peace of dwelling in divine abundance.

Living with Excuses

I had every intention of reading the whole Wayne Dyer book, Excuses Begone, before today. But I’m afraid my knee was sore, I got busy, Meg hid it, the kids were fighting, the next door neighbor’s dog stole it…………..I have read enough of Excuses Begone to recommend it to many of you. Its very good and hugely empowering.

It’s a frightening exercise to see how often you catch yourself in a day making excuses. It almost becomes second nature. Here are some popular excuses used by people who get caught sleeping at their work desk:

# In Jesus name. Amen!
# Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our organization’s biggest problem.
# I wasn’t sleeping! I was meditating on the company’s mission statement!

Seinfeld’s George Costanza was a serial liar. As he said, “My whole life is a sham.” He had some great work excuses. His advice was, “one should also always try to look impatient and annoyed to give your boss the impression that you are busy.” There was one memorable occasion when he built a nap station under his desk? So one day he was napping under his desk, when his boss came in and decided to wait for him to return. He waited there 3 hours. During this time, his grandchildren and their dog came to visit. George called in a bomb threat from a telephone under his desk to try and get them out of his office. The boss screamed out, “There’s a bomb. Quick kids. Everyone under the desk.” So 5 kids and a dog, and his boss all scrambled under the desk where George was lying.

George once said to Jerry, “Jerry, just remember, it’s not a lie if you believe it.” But it is. In fact they are the worst sort of lies. Excuses come so naturally after a life time of practicing. Like George, excuses and lies, especially ones you have convinced yourself are true, always come back to bite you. They don’t serve any good purpose in your life.

How many of you have been pulled over by the police? How many of you sit there thinking up excuses while they walk to your car? Last year when we were driving back from C3 North, I was pulled over for speeding (just a fraction over the speed limit. It was marginal. Believe me). Do you know what I said? I kid you not, these words came out of my mouth – “The guy in front was going faster.” What am I, 6 years old? As if the policeman was going to say, “Well in that case, don’t worry. Just be on your way and no matter how fast others are driving, make sure you are going slower than them.” The incredible postscript to that story is that he DID let me off with a warning. I was lucky.

Here are a few other excuses NOT to try on the police:

# Office, would you mind holding my beer while I get my drivers license?
# Aren’t you the guy from the Village People?
# Don’t you know that I pay your salary?

Why do you make excuses?

To remove your own responsibility. The origin of the word “excuse” is to be cleared of responsibility. When you are making an excuse you are usually looking for someone or something to blame; parents, genes, upbringing, politicians…..As spiritual beings on a human journey, you want to live at a much higher level of integrity than that. You want to live with responsibility. From a spiritual perspective, you can’t be excused and you can’t excuse another person, because each person is responsible for their own journey of growth. You don’t want to rob yourself of the empowerment of taking responsibility. Excuses begone.

Because you feel the need to defend something. You think there is something to protect, so you build a wall around yourself. Each brick is an excuse; I’m too shy, too ill disciplined, too disorganized. These excuses do nothing to fill your life with power. You have forgotten that you can’t defend God. The inner Self doesn’t need to be defended because there is nothing to lose and nothing that can be added. Excuses begone.

The Difference Between an Excuse and a Reason

Before you get too down on yourself, and the weight of your own excuses become a cause for more guilt, let me say this. There is a world of difference between an excuse and a reason. Aim for reasons, not excuses. Reasons are considered, mindful and honest. Excuses are reactive, mindless and dishonest. Reasons are deeper down in the nested self. Excuses are just the outer layer.

The major difference between a reason and an excuse is accountability. Reasons are considered explanations with everyone taking responsibility for their part in a situation. An excuse always involves blame, either of yourself or another or circumstances that you feel are out of your control.

Celebrate reasons. Reasons are part of your divine ability to think and assess situations. Let your yes be yes. But be careful. An excuse is never a reason, but a reason may be an excuse. The reality of life is that most situations are a complicated blend of reasons and excuses.
Only you will know the difference, and usually only after some self reflection.

Watch your reasons, lest they are simply masquerading as excuses. Offer other people the same grace as the inner self offers you.

Excuses begone, for they don’t serve you and they don’t serve the world.

Excuses and Spiritual Community

Now apply the same “excuses begone” thinking to your commitment to your spiritual journey.

Here is a fun hypothetical to think about. I have decided to inaugurate “No excuse Sunday!” This annual gathering will cater to all those who just can’t seem to make it very often. In order to make it possible for everyone to be present, several precautions will be taken to eliminate all excuses. Cots will be placed in the foyer for those who say “Sunday is my only day to sleep in.” Cushions will be positioned for those who find the pews too hard. Blankets can be picked up on your way in if you find it too cold, and hand held fans if you find it too hot. Face masks will be provided for those who don’t want to be seen in church, and name tags for those who do.

There will be hearing aids for those who can’t hear the preacher and cotton wool for those who don’t want to! We will have coffee for those who want to be kept awake, and sleeping pills for those who don’t.

Music will include a Bach Cantata, U2 and a Jazz quartet. Why shouldn’t you have your music preferences satisfied on a Sunday? Personal crosses will be provided for those looking for a little more religion, and crystals for those who aren’t.

Finally, please submit lists of all the people you don’t like and we will inform them that they are unwelcome that day. All hypocrites will be barred from entrance so that you don’t have to tolerate their hateful double standards and judgments.

By the way, I once heard the saying, “I won’t attend any church that would welcome me.”

Here is the point of the story. You are committed to spiritual growth and healing. You are committed to this centre for spiritual growth; both for yourself and to support others in their growth. There are many excuses and a handful of reasons why you would not be absolutely, 120% committed to this centre for spiritual growth. Be very clear which is which, and how important they are in the scheme of things.

Think of spiritual community as a wedding banquet where all people are invited. All is prepared. The table is set. The wine is mixed. The call has gone out far and wide – all are welcome. Come in, grow and heal, no matter what your beliefs or background. Come as you are. Leave behind all that is non essential to your spirit and the spirits of others. Leave behind excuses that delude the spirit. Banish fear and blame that prevent you from experiencing the fullness of life. This has nothing to do with guilt, and everything to do with responsibility and service. The world needs you, freed from judgment and excuses, to spread peace and goodwill to all.

You have come so far. Old truths and securities no longer serve you. Come back to your essence. Come back to the truth you cant ignore any longer; that life is meant to be lived in peace and self awareness.

Excuses begone. They don’t serve you and they don’t serve the world. Excuses begone. Strip away excuses and judgments to reveal the brilliant, shining, God or Goddess that lies at the very heart of things. I honor your divine ability to discern reasons from excuses. I honor your courage to make hard decisions for responsibility and service. Above all, I honor the divine light in you that is pure, radiating bliss. Namaste.